Joanne's Example
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I was at a Mental Health Coalition committee meeting. There were many opportunities for participation in several areas. Sign up sheets were being distributed as the chairperson stressed the need for members involvement. I felt confused. I had racing thoughts about which to choose. I had some head pressure and a tightness in my chest. My impulse was to sign up for a task on each of the sheets. People needed help. I forced myself to calm my racing thoughts. I resisted the impulse. I can't control my feelings and sensations, but I can control my thoughts and impulses. I would select one sheet. Since I was interested in several of the areas I just signed to help on the sheet which had the fewest people listed. I spotted my exaggerated sense of responsibility. Other members were on the committee. I spotted that my symptoms were distressing, but not dangerous. I spotted the will to control my muscles; I didn't apologize for not signing up for more and I didn't sign on more than one sheet. I became a realist. I lowered my standards for myself and my performance rose. Before Recovery, I would have signed up to help with all of the areas. I would either then have pushed myself to attend every meeting, complete every task assigned, do it all 100% and ultimately burn myself out or I would have signed up, not been able to complete the tasks and become depressed. I would certainly give long detailed explanations as to why I couldn't help. I would then process for days about whether or not I had made the right choice. I wanted so much to gain others approval before Recovery. When I am in a manic state I have tremendous energy. When I am in lowered feelings I have low energy. Since Recovery training, although I may still want to do everything, I know that I am only human and need to do a realistic amount. It is never easy for me to say no when I know someone needs help, but I am learning to do so. Keeping a balance is essential, but that is not easy. Further Spotting! Brad-- This example demonstrates how Joanne's study and practice of the method helped her to make a real decision to put her mental health first. Helen-- I like her use of self discipline. She recognized her averageness which usually means better performance in the opportunities she chose to accept. Mike --Instead of being frustrated from having a super exaggerated sense of responsibility, she can feel more relaxed as she does these tasks. What does that mean? spotted-- In spotting, Joanne looks beneath the surface of her experiences in order to realize their meaning in terms of better mental health. She was able to look at her difficulty with concentration and "spot" it as not dangerous so she could go ahead with other options in spite of the discomfort. distressing but not dangerous-- Joanne has learned that nervous symptoms of her anxiety, her desire to flee, lack of focus, restlessness, etc., are all "garden variety" and average. They are not dangerous and can be born. Without the idea of danger, she can calm down and do what she has to do or wants to do. lowered my standards -- We often see such as in this example, a paradox in that when we lower our standards our performance tends to go up. Joanne took the burden off her shoulders of being 100%. If you look at what would have happened before Recovery, you can see how her performance was so much better.
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